Slow Sunday (with Skype!)

Best friend dragged me into a group Skype session. It’s rather sad when I don’t even have energy for that.

Or to Skype one on one with her after.

My linework is predominantly done, however.

And then I’m a bit insulted she wanted me to text her. Then didn’t text me really after.

I dunno. This…plan they have. It’s fantastic, yet I feel…barred in by it. I’m hoping that’s a side effect from stress and levels of depression.

Otherwise my intuition is saying “don’t do it”.

When did I, eccentric and slightly erratic in plans and dreams, become practical and analytically thoughtful on the matter?

I digress. Avoiding Facebook now entirely.

People don’t care. People are terrible. And I’m still being poked my someone on there. (Literally- Facebook’s poke feature.)

26 days to go. I’m royally fucked. Moving files/copying them over. Coloring all day tomorrow. And Tuesday.

Maybe I just won’t go to class that evening.

We’ll see.

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Friday Allergies

Mine are kicking me in the ass.

So I’m washing sheets. Getting nothing done. But hey- an assignment was turned in, and Monday morning I have an appointment to talk to one of my past instructors.

So here I am, widdling away time I don’t have again, feeling like shit and questioning choices left and right.

It could be entirely worse- but my health took a turn come the afternoon.

At least I’m getting pizza tomorrow.

And hopefully my soup is still okay. Probably now. I’m so bad about this goodness me…

October starts my challenge with my best friend in getting healthier.

I do believe I’ll also start livestreaming come December or the new year. I hope I’ll get to. I think it’ll be fun.

Two cups of tea down tonight. How many more will I dare?

Good Impressions

I’m still reeling on that fact.

I have two bogus classes. I’m losing lack of interest or faith in their credibility or usefulness.

But I’m still so shocked I’ve made even remotely a good impression like I have with such prestigious places like that.

I also have appointments coming up to discuss with instructors I’ve had- picking their minds and taking their advice into consideration.

It’s been…such a crazy last few days. I’m humbled, terrified, and hopeful.

Talked to mom. Talked to my best friend. Just…wow.

(Plus if I ever decide to take on graduate school within my degree sets- I know where I’d like to go. 😉 That won’t break the bank any more than necessary!)

Unexpected Tuesday

I ate too muuuuch. Blame exhaustion. Will stretch to remedy some of that discomfort.

Need to wash my face and get some sleep.

It’s been a very, very long day.

And unexpectedly good- to which might prove fruitful in the long run.

I’m just….excruciatingly exhausted and tired of people trying to plan my life.

But today went very, very well. I’m…relieved about that. And I’m relieved my best friend and her husband jumped in to help me fix my resume. ❤

Skype Session Afternoons

Homework pushed aside again- I had every intention. Kind of.

But best friend wanted to skype, so best friend became priority.

Life is curious right now. Always so curious.

Yoga. Relaxed. No tea today, but perhaps come tomorrow. ❤

Priorities are being managed a day at a time.

Not much else to say, otherwise. Other than my campus isn’t safe right now and that’s frustrating.

Fridays, Sleep, Arguments, Repeat.

I got to sleep in. During college, it’s vital to nab it while I can.

No homework was accomplished. However my phone has access to the wifi on campus. My best friend skyped with me for about three hours. It was needed, nice, and helped the both of us. It’s good to know one of your most precious people has your back.

And my mom and I had an argument about her grabbing my last paycheck.

Otherwise a quiet day. Grabbed coffee with my brother, and proceeded to grab food at the pub (I know, I know. My spending habits are so-so.)

Soups for the next week, and simple foods until I buy some actual things to prep meals.

Down to eating a meal a day again, kinda. (Oops.)

Breathing. Being. Slowly taking everything on a day at a time.

Sipping at some tea, reflecting. Relaxing. Feeling the day take its toll.

Wednesdays and Best Friends

I spent my day messaging my best friend.

All day.

It was nice. 🙂

I wasn’t feeling well. Overwhelmed by how tired I just am currently. However I took the day to rest. My best friend made up for it.

Too bad mom wants some paperwork found this weekend. Hate to break it to her…but they might have been tossed.

I don’t care what she says, she very well may have moved them. Or I might have thrown them in the trash.

Well, that’s gonna be a bummer if they prove to be the case.

Oh well.

Enjoying the cooler temperatures. Ink tomorrow.

Found a game trailer. A game made by one person. On Unreal Engine 4. I’m impressed.

And rekindled fascination and drive. I know my ambitions after I graduate. I just hope they prove to be enough…

Anger. Work. And A Respiratory Tea

Coworkers piss me off. Usurping me and taking what I’ve been hired to do from out underneath me.

Work is tiring, and I’m not paid nearly enough to care as much as I do about it. I calmed down when I realized it’s not the end of the world. And I really aren’t paid enough to care too much.

But I was gifted two cupcakes today. And you know what? It made the day so much better.

I smiled at the end of it, because soon I’m returning to the environment in which I blossom and grow. I have so much to accomplish, and so little time to do it. But I can succeed, so long as I put my feet forward one step at a time.

After work I had a long chat with one of my best friends. 2016 just hasn’t added up to what we’ve needed. I suggested it was a prelude before a calm next year. Here’s to hoping I’m not wrong, and have some gift of premonition foresight.

Momma picked up a medicinal tea targeted to respiratory problems for me today. The taste is…bizarre. I’m not overly fond of it. However if it relaxes my lungs so I can breathe properly without strain, I’ll suffer through it.

Mondays are Mondays. Just four more days of work. And tomorrow I plan on calling my tattoo artist. It’s time for my next ink. 🙂

Cohabitation

I suck at it. The older I get, the harder it is for me to live with many people. Or, so it seems. I have my quirks. To which I’m always putting on the backburner. For them. And they, 90% of the time, don’t reciprocate.

I know I shouldn’t complain too much about it. After all, I’m living at home primarily free of charge for four months of the year.

Doesn’t mean it’s okay for my mother to disregard me and my opinions.

Doesn’t help I constantly bite my own tongue to keep quiet.

We fight anyway. Everyone fights me nowadays. Because I’m increasingly uncontrollable. Because I’m erratic and extreme and cautious in a package that makes almost zero sense. yet here I am.

If many of us were to settle in a new place entirely, it would be better. But we’re not. Yet, anyway.

Talked to one of my best friends today. It appears…we’ve made a leap in moving plans. We have two goals. A backup for the other. But they’re feasible.

We’ll be able to cohabitate easily, because we’d all be picking up and starting over with very little, in a place of our of which we’d all be adjusting to.

I can’t cohabitate right now. I absolutely hate it. But I’m picky. I’m fickle. I have my comforts. Which are constantly disrespected.

Biting my tongue is causing me more stress. I don’t want this. It hurts.

And my boyfriend thinks cohabitating with me would be a piece of cake.

HA.

~ a little white dove