Backstabbed

I’ve been entirely backstabbed by one of the fuckers who came to my graduation.

He was holding onto a few things we didn’t have room for. And sent it all, along with a borrowed tv, back to the friend I can’t handle right now (political reasons) because he’s throwing his gay-ass hissy fit and being a little shit.

It sent me into tears.

At least my PS4 is running, my PS3 software has been updated, and there are no more mice.

I just need to find a way to get surround sound (seeing as the PS4 slim no longer has the output for it…)

OH! I deleted the twat on Facebook. He blocked me and unfollowed me everywhere. (Ha. Like I was planning on ever following him on Instagram.)

Tired and Trying

Too tired. But hey- I’m getting things done.

My evening class I was barely functioning by the end. My instructor is no longer pressing me- I get it’s due to me not showcasing. But I just have too much going on, and I’m exhausted, and I do not feel like talking to people I don’t know, about a project I’ve lost heart in.

I also apologize for short entries. I’m tired, and busy. I’m binging on Downton Abbey, because I need something to pick me up a bit right now.

I’ll elaborate a bit more later this week. πŸ™‚

Running Around

Honestly all I did. (So much for that homework, yeah?)

Food for Thursday.

Decorations to annoy my brother figure.

Me eating too much- but hey, protein?

A burrito for tomorrow saved.

And…yeah. I have a hair appointment at 10am tomorrow. I have copious amounts of homework still to do. And my mouth and tonsils hurt. I think allergies and the super hot burrito I had for lunch did me in.

Shouldn’t feel this heavy, but that’s probably the exhaustion kicking in. Will finish this cup and then crawl into bed for some rest.

Two weeks until this project is due. But hey- all of my clothes are here now?

Election, 2016

I was nervous throughout the day.

I never expected to end my day in fear.

I wasn’t fortunate enough to have my voter registration in time to vote. The state in which I reside did vote for Clinton.

But to the dismay of many, wondering across the board what happened, we’re looking at reign of Donald Trump for four years.

An orange colored man, a sexist and racist Vice President, holding one of the most powerful positions in the first world.

And I see a select few people I know cheering; celebrating how a crook didn’t win. But they have no idea the damage done.

I’ve been on a tirade all across Facebook- posts ranging from fear and anger and more fear, to posts how Americans shouldn’t lose hope and that the sun will still rise and shine on us. And how we’ll unite together and fight for each other against whatever the government might throw our way.

I’m so beyond depressed I’m not functioning right. I drank four or so beers throughout part of it. Was not sober. Could still function well.

My two best friends are looking to grab their passports.

Two of us are terrified among the three. The other is worried, and trying to keep me afloat. I don’t know how to be afloat.

I’m drowning. As is so much of this country. And the globe is shaken and concerned.

We’ve damaged us.

We’ve divided us.

I’m livid. I respect a right to vote.

That doesn’t mean I don’t have the right to be livid and rage and scream and cry and break apart as I watch my world crumble ever more. My rights as a woman. The rights of my gay/lesbian friends. The rights of the rising transgender populace. The rights of all color. The rights of immigrants. The asylum of Muslims fleeing their homes.

What have we fucking done?

Taking A Reprieve

That’s all that happened.

Gave my lesson. May have gone well. May have gone terribly. It’s over and done with now, however.

As for the evening class, I didn’t attend. Too damn tired.

Ate pizza and had mocha.

Too much food. Even thought I’ve barely eaten. It’s what happens when I’m beyond exhausted.

But one less major assignment done.

Just one to go, really.

Currently building a website website. For promotional and portfolio work.

I may give a link to it later this year. πŸ™‚

Tuesday’s Breakdown

After my evening class. Came back overwhelmed.

So I broke down.

My mom worried about me. I worried about me. Binged on Taco Bell tacos and ice cream after brother came by. He’d had a rough week too.

So we watched the god awful Twilight Saga because it was something tangible to ground us and mock.

So much going on and I justΒ don’t know how I’m going to get it all done.